To Provoke or Not to Provoke

August 31, 2008

The catcalls, the hissing, the blowing kisses, the marriage proposals…Gringas and Chilenas alike are tortured on the streets by the macho little boys who think women are nothing more than pieces of meat for them to oggle.

There have actually been debates though, in respected newspapers in this country on whether or not the harassment on the street is harmless. In the comment section, when El Mercurio, I believe it was, wrote an article, many women even commented on how they love the “piropos,” and all women should just enjoy them while they’re still getting them. Honestly, that attitude makes me feel a little sick inside. But, moving on, whether they’re Ok or not isn’t actually the topic I wanted to discuss.

What I wanted to talk about is when it’s appropriate to respond. Emily, as many of you already know, was robbed. This has made her slightly angrier and much more untrusting of this country in general…which in turn has her yelling back insults at any guy who dares make a creepy remark in her direction. Understandable.

This is something I do on occassion as well. No, I don’t respond back to every man who has the nerve to say something slimy, but depending on my mood, who I’m with, and where I am, I often feel the need to tell the guy off too. This has caused me problems a few times, like once when I retaliated to a guy making obscene gestures, we got into a yelling fight on the street and I told him I wanted his entire generation to die.

Some of our other friends say they never do this. One doesn’t live in the best neighborhood and is worried she’ll get into problems too. Another just wears her earphones everywhere she goes, which for the most part, I now do too.

Sometimes, I feel really good after I let a dirtbag have it. And other times I wonder if all that rage is unhealthy. In all honesty I know that one gringa saying, “Fuck off you dirty old man,” doesn’t change much in the grand scheme of things. But, not saying anything ever feels wrong!

When we all got to talking about it, I was actually surprised by most of my girlfriends’ responses. I assumed that all gringas who know enough Spanish to retaliate, do. Turns out, the ones I know usually don’t.

So what are your thoughts on this? To respond, or not to respond, that is the question of the day…

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Spring Is In the Air

August 29, 2008

A few nights ago I walked outside and the weather was downright balmy — which is not an adjective frequently heard when describing Santiago. If I had closed my eyes and not breathed (as soon as you take a gulp of fresh air the smog definitely let’s you know right where you are) I could have sworn that I was in Tampa on a winter evening.

Lately I’ve been missing Tampa a LOT — although never in the, “I want to move back there,” way. Just in the, “I wish we weren’t saving all our money and I wasn’t petrified of flying so I could go back and visit more,” way.

If there is one downfall of being an expat, it’s that you will always be missing somewhere or something. That doesn’t mean you’re homesick and crying yourself to sleep every night. It just means that places you’ve previously inhabited and people that you used to know still live on inside you.

If you’re an expat, whether you’re leaving or arriving “home,” (and when you’re an expat the definition of the word home is definitely murky) you’re most likely saying goodbye to someone important in your life — whether it be your husband’s family because you’re leaving his home, your own family and friends because you’re leaving the country you were born in, or maybe just friends you have made in a random place you’ve chosen to set up residency. You’re always leaving behind loved ones and cities with memories whether you’re coming or going. Goodbye is no longer just a word, it’s now the inevitable.

PS. Don’t forget to vote. The topics have been narrowed down with a first round of votes and now we’re doing the second round to decide what we’ll actually write about for our next group blogging experiment a week from today!

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Time to Vote (Again)

August 28, 2008

Ok, the choices have been narrowed down so go ahead and vote for whatever you want to write about (or want to see us write about) next Friday.

Also, the lovely Florencia just did a very interesting post on Chilean weddings, if you want to check it out…and hopefully she’ll be able to participate in our group blogging topic for next Friday. It’s always good to hear the Chilean perspective on what we’re talking abotu!

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